my mail doesn't come until 4 o clock, and i have found i am unable to focus until i hear the squealing brakes of the truck at the end of my driveway. i count slowly (to roughly 200 - but probably more like 250), just enough time so the mailperson doesnt think i'm completely tapped and have nothing better to do than wait for him/her (i do, i just cant!), then calmly, rationally, jump over the stone wall and silently tell myself it's all for the best, a la mr. white's advice.
once inside, i permit myself to look at the return addresses, then dejectedly toss all holiday cards, ONE! DAY! ONLY! sale fliers, and economist/u.s. news and world reports/ vogues on the dining room table as i am finally able to sit down and study physics.
i have just returned from a lovely evening in the company of jon and lauren at chez ouellet. we pretended to be studying, but really we sniffed freshly baked cupcakes, drank liters of diet coke, rereassured one another about college, discussed real vs. fake christmas trees, and talked about people hiding in the closet. in between greg called, so we paused for a half an hour or so to contemplate his lust life, wished for the millionth billionth time to be out of high school, and sighed over how he scored a 5 on the calculus BC ap exam. (perspective: i take calc AB and it's so difficult [understatement of the yearrrrrr]. but a calc BC class would have been at the point im at currently during the first week of november. #$!%$#%^# after jon left, lau and i abandoned all senses of self control (not to mention the calculus studying...) and made smoothies with soy frozen yogurt and frozen strawberries and orange juice. then we sat back in the glow of her (artficial) christmas tree and soft kitchen lights, ate our delicious concotion with teaspoons, learned about crazy ap bio experiments, laughed over 33 fat gram "coffees," and briefly allowed ourselves to imagine what could happen in the course of the next 48 hours. afterwards, her mom and i debated paper vs. plastic a bit as they decorated the living room. i departed with a goofy grin, full of frozen soy/banana/strawberry/orangle/apple mix and holiday cheer.
two claps for turning the sound down on life for a bit - even if it's only temporary.
it is now 1018 and i still have to read some sophocles (oedipus the king). awesome.