things that suck:
1. when you're on your way early to school to hand in even more college applications now that you need more safety schools and it starts to snow and you lose control of your car and you crash into not one but two trees and you hysterically call your mom and have hallucinations and your dad, on his way to work, sees you stranded on the side of the road and runs to you and you shake and shiver and your mom arrives and they hold you as you gather the important things from your car (books, backpack, cd's, and the stem from a long ago received red geranium [the petals disintegrated upon the first tree collision] that has rested on the dashboard since last may and he probably doesnt even remember giving it to you) and there are two other cars that have spun out (not as a result of you, the roads are just extremely icy) and you cant even remember how you ended up perpendicular to that on ramp but you cry and cry because you are selfish and you cry and cry and think of everyone you love and you go to the hospital and they take x rays multiple times and they give you valium and then you sleep.
things that are incredible:
1. being alive
maybe i will tell you all about it when i'm in the mood to lose my way with words.
p.s. - i love you.