fuck.
i hate when words fail me.
something is wrong and i wish i could tell you what it is. i haven't seen you in forever and it kills me. 4 months? almost 5.
most of the time i walk around pretending not to notice, not to care, and then bam. i catch sight of the crumbling stem in the corner of my eye, purposely difficult to focus in on, and this inexplicable wave of... numbness ... hits me and i curse myself for ever believing your empty words and false promises.
i wrote you another letter. and afterwards, i reread it and hated the person who wrote it, so i ripped it to tiny pieces and watched them fall like confetti to the floor.
i hate myself even more when i listen to dashboard.
there are many things that i would like to say to you but i don't know how
So Beautiful
I heard that you were home again, but you don't look like youre back to me
With your focuses changing your gaze is transfixed on a point that I can't often see
You've got youre new ties, I've got my old knots, you've got youre inside lines
I heard that you were living well, but you don't look like youre living to me
Though the sparkle is gone, the smile is in place so that everyone watching can see
You've got them all convinced, but I know it so well
That you could list your friends, but you can't count on them
Hold it now
You've got everyone convinced that youre alright
When no one else is quite as vulnerable
As soon as you got it you want something else
It's not the sale that you love, its the sell
It's not the price that's going to cost you
It's just the weight that's going to bring you
Down, down, down, down
It's going to bring you down, down, down, down, down
Hold it now
You've got everyone convinced that your alright
When no one else is quite as vulnerable
As soon as you got it you want something else
It's not the sale that you love, its the sell
It's not the price that's going to cost you
It's just the weight that's going to bring you
Down, down, down, down
It's going to bring you down, down, down, down, down
As soon as you got it you want something else
It's not the sale that you love, its the sell
It's not the price that's going to cost you
It's just the weight that's going to bring you
Down